Just do it!
Why is it that some of us, myself included on occasion, may have all the qualifications and the life experience, yet we continue to doubt ourselves?
This can lead to a debilitating set of circumstances where we freeze and do nothing, or retreat to the easier jobs? The more difficult/ stressful ones get placed to the bottom of the pile until we say, we are feeling more confident, or we feel that we must complete another course/ qualification before we move forward.
We can create a state of inertia inside of us that can last as long as we let it?
Sometimes you may have the confidence to simply say “just do it” and you crack on with it, but that confidence level can waver all the time. Until you complete a few “just do its” and realise that you do have the ability, you can do it.
Completing these “just do its” are essential in increasing your confidence and giving you that faith in yourself.
That I bet, those around you already have? What is that about? Why are we so harsh on ourselves? Yet, if we asked people around us what they thought of us they would likely say things like, organised, kind, reliable, funny and proactive. Whereas, if we asked the same question of ourselves, we would not be so kind at all. Try this exercise out yourself, ask those around you what they like about you?
Why is our inner voice, our inner critic? Always trying to criticise us or hold us back? A recent study estimated that we spend a quarter of our waking hours attending to our inner voice. But, this inner voice is always going to err on the side of pessimism due to this inner voice being there ultimately to protect us from danger and keep us safe. This inner voice Is part of our fight or flight response. The part of our brain that wants to keep us safe, preserve energy or to take the safest route.
Not saying that any of that is a bad thing, it’s just that this inner voice is not always right and should be challenged.
Prime example, its Sunday evening you are ready to start a new week, this week you have decided that you will exercise every morning so you will get up at 6.30am. Before bed the alarm is set and off to sleep you go. The alarm wakes you at 6.30am, your inner voice chirps up, stay here in your safe and warm bed, you don’t need to exercise today. The inner voice is not always on the right side, nor does it know what is best for you. You roll over, hit snooze and agree with the inner voice, the easiest route. Yet, you wake at your getting up time, cursing the fact that you missed your workout, cursing the fact that you didn’t get up, cursing the fact that you listened to your inner voice and allowed it to take control.
The same happens day in/ day out, this inner critic which allows you to create these feelings of self-doubt, of uncertainty. This imposter syndrome that we are not worthy or we will never be good enough, you know what, that inner critic would love you to stay safe in bed all day long in case of dangers lurking outside, but we would never achieve anything, go anywhere, indeed we would make ourselves ill due to the lack of stimulation.
The expression “fake it till you make it” I think is a great one. People don’t know what is going on inside your head, they only start to understand when you give them clues or simply by telling them. Therefore, act confident, act as if you are the person you want to be. Nobody will know otherwise. Instead of allowing your inner critic to be the boss, take control of it, it’s not always right.
If you think, yes but I don’t know enough about this or that? Confidence is not about being able to recount endless facts and figures, or give out encyclopaedic knowledge in a subject. Remember you are an expert in something if you know more than the next man. Now if the next man is albert Einstein then I feel your pain. However, it isn’t going to be. You can always respond with, “that’s a really interesting thought I have never considered, so I will check it out and get back to you” or words to that effect.
I love this quote by Fritz Perls “anxiety is the gap between the now and the later”.
That is, anxiety is generated by our thoughts on what might happen. Mindfulness is a great way to stop living inside your head and falling for the “bullshit Journey” of the pessimistic inner critic. When you notice that you are worrying about something that has yet to happen, or, your inner critic is providing you with endless reasons why you may not be so good at it, or why you may fail. Stop it, kick it out of the park, let it go. That thought is just bullshit. You can train yourself to listen less to this inner critic, mindfulness is a skill that we can all perfect and learn.
You know what, life is a journey and often our failures allow us to rise like a phoenix out of the ashes with a renewed sense of direction and an experience that we will never forget and a commitment to do better in the future. No-one is perfect here, and really who would want to be? I love the concept of constant evolution, that we are constantly learning, reflecting and striving to be better.
Learn to accept you, the wonderful, imperfect version of you.
You are as amazing as the next person and can achieve anything that you set your mind to. But, you must take control and responsibility for what you do and where you direct your thoughts and energies.
Once you take control and responsibility if a thought or an idea does not sit with where you want to be, get rid of it, simply let it drift away and focus on the right thoughts for you.
So, don’t stay safe and stay in bed, take risks, challenge yourself and that inner nagging voice of doubt. Don’t allow that imposter syndrome take over. Switch the voice to “just do it” and crack
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Thank you for reading
If you feel that you need some help get in touch or check out my “self-help for success” hypnotherapy which is a wonderful hypnotherapy guaranteed to kickstart you and your ideas on where you need to be heading in 2018.
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